Sunday, January 10, 2016

WHY YOU ARE FEELING NOT GOOD ENOUGH; A 3 Part Series


Hey guys, welcome to my blog. I can't tell you how excited I get when you stop by. I'm so thankful that am able to inspire you to keep coming back. Have you ever felt like you are not good enough and don't deserve good things that happen to you? Well, I have. Like always, I'm very delighted to share how I got over it. But first, let's take a look at the contributing factors that make us feel not good enough. These factors are:

1. Environmental

2. Physical and Mental/Intellectual Comparison

3. Past Mistakes/Failures
ENVIRONMENTAL CONTRIBUTION TO NOT FEELING GOOD ENOUGH

I have intentionally grouped a bunch of factors under Environmental because it is wise to say that they are all primary contributing factors present in the environment. It is general knowledge that the environment comprises everything that surrounds and influences an individual on a personal level. These things include: family, neighbors, the church, schools and the culture that the individual is socialized into. The main focus of this factor is the family because it is the first and most important agent of socialization. This is so because nobody gets to choose what family to be born into. If your childhood is filled with negative experiences that have left you "feeling not good enough," chances are you will grow up with that chip on your shoulder. Hence, parents ought to be very cautious of how they treat their children especially in cases where the child/children stepped out of line. If every time your child makes a mistake you decide to deal with the situation by telling him/her that they are not good enough, or that they can never do the right thing, that simple careless expression repeated multiple times, could drastically alter their self-esteem. You would have let your careless use of such negative expressions to breed an adult or adults who would never feel good enough. I guess what I'm trying to say is that words have significant power and it doesn't matter what the intentions are behind them or how loosely they are said or well thought of. In essence, your child's future could be drastically impacted by your "careless" use of certain expressions. I have found out that the best way to handle a situation when your child has stepped out of line is to deal with it as is. Don't generalize your judgement because you are angry, by calling your child irresponsible and good for nothing. Learn to forgive and let go of each incident. Especially if the child has served some type of punishment for his previous actions.


If your child's foundation is filled with disapproval and rejection from you, it has a way of becoming a trend in the environment where you live. Others who watch you treat your child with disdain will follow your example and do the same. However, there are often exceptions to this claim because I have found out that there will be good people around you who would not treat your child badly because you do. It is a lot easier to train and discipline a child in the right way, than to fix a broken adult. Here is how the above illustration and explanation apply to the subject matter: The way that you're feeling about yourself could have something to do with your childhood experiences in your environment. The great thing about realizing what you are lacking is that you can change it. You have the power to change your perception of self at any point in your life. Your view of yourself and your worth can only improve if you make a conscious effort to change it and this can only happen when you begin to embrace who you are and intentionally redirect your mind to feel worthy of what you have and take charge of your dreams. And that concludes the first part of this piece. Come by tomorrow for the second part. Thanks for reading!!
Here's a throwback photo from when I got a bearhug from a humongous Teddy Bear.